Scar-Free and Feeling Fine

I don't waste the Dark Lord's time
I've never been to Azkaban
My father is a normal man

Because I'm
Totally insignificant

I'm a wizard, but not pureblood
I belong in Hufflepuff
I've never battled any trolls
I've never gone down secret holes

Because I'm
Totally insignificant

I'm not friends with Harry Potter
I'm not some famous person's daughter
I don't descend from Peverell
I've never met a dog from Hell

I've never blown up an aunt
I'm totally insignificant!

Scar-free and feeling fine
I don't waste the Dark Lord's time
Harry Potter gets all the glory
So I'm not even a part of the story . . .

I make the best cheering charm around
I can exchange Galleons to pounds
I know a potion that makes you fuzz
But it doesn't matter at all, because

I've never fought a dragon on a broomstick
I've never spewed slugs when I've been sick
I've never dueled Lord Voldemort
I don't hang out with the Deatheater sort

I'm scar-free and feeling fine.